Chronicles of Spiritual Direction: Iron Love

Two months ago I began to meet for the first time with a spiritual director. It’s an experience that has at once been very comfortable and very foreign to me. The conversations aren’t unlike those I’ve maintained for many years in serial with different friendships, yet the language and the questions that I have fed back to me are challenging and fruitful in making the familiar strange to me — where Gød is in a particular experience, whether there is an invitation in a certain image. After a decade of pursuing Gød (and almost 28 years of Gød pursuing me), they invite me to find what is new in the small and in the old, when so much feels recycled and my attentions are set so habitually on the novel and explicit. Continue reading “Chronicles of Spiritual Direction: Iron Love”

Discerning and Becoming: Better Living through Examen

Who do you want to become? It had been a while since I asked myself that question. Through the prevailing uncertainty since I first began to consider seriously quitting my career and moving to Cleveland, the more immediate questions have been along the lines of what I want to become: Do I really want to be a pastor? If I’m not going to be able to support myself as a pastor immediately, what do I want to be? Also, where do I want to be? What church and which neighborhood? Not to mention, when do I want to be there? ‘Who’ gets lost in the flurry of existential and quotidian concerns. I take for granted who I am, which amounts to my not taking it as a serious consideration. It’s tempting to feel that with the many practical questions I have about my life in the coming months I don’t have time to wonder about the kind of person I want to be. But this is to miss how integral these answers are to my character. It is to forget that who I am being formed into may be all that matters. Continue reading “Discerning and Becoming: Better Living through Examen”